An Orthodox wedding: what you need, in what order, and how to work with your parish

Deciding to marry is a joy. Organising the wedding, though, brings plenty of questions: where do we begin, what paperwork is needed, how early should we book the church, and what exactly does the koumbaros do? This guide sets out the steps in the order most Orthodox parishes follow. It does not replace a conversation with your own parish. Requirements differ from one Metropolis to another and change over time, so always confirm the current position with your priest and, in Greece, on gov.gr. If you are marrying in a parish abroad, your diocese will have its own procedures.

Step one: contact the parish

The first thing to do is speak to the parish where you would like the wedding to take place. If that church is not in the parish where you live, ask how the two parishes coordinate. In that first conversation it is worth asking:

• Which dates are available, and which periods of the Church year do not allow weddings.
• Which documents each of you will need, and who gathers them.
• Whether the parish has its own guidelines on flowers, photography and music.
• When you can meet the priest for a first conversation.

In busy seasons such as the summer, dates go quickly. The earlier you get in touch, the more choice you will have.

The marriage licence from the Metropolis

A church wedding needs a licence, which is issued by the relevant Metropolis or diocese. The process usually begins through your parish priest, who knows what his Metropolis asks for. In broad terms, the paperwork concerns the identity of the couple, the fact that both are baptised and that nothing stands in the way of the marriage. The exact list, how it is submitted and how long it takes all vary, so do not rely on a checklist found online or on what applied at a friend's wedding some years ago.

If either of you was baptised in another parish or another country, or belongs to another Christian tradition, say so from the start. Such cases usually need more time and further discussion with the Metropolis. You may also need to request a baptism certificate from the parish where you were baptised.

The koumbaros or koumbara

The koumbaros, the sponsor of the wedding, is not simply an honorary role. During the sacrament he or she exchanges the wedding crowns and takes on a spiritual relationship with the new couple. For this reason the sponsor is usually expected to be an Orthodox Christian, and their own details or documents may be needed. Check with the parish before you ask someone, so that nobody is put in an awkward position later.

Talking with the priest before the wedding

Many priests like to meet the couple before the wedding, once or several times. This is not an examination. It is a chance to talk about the meaning of the sacrament, hear what happens during the service and ask questions about the life you are beginning together. The priest may also suggest confession before the wedding. If you live far from the parish where you will marry, ask whether these conversations can take place with your own local priest.

Practical planning for the day

Once the formalities are under way, the practical side remains. A simple checklist helps:

• Time and length: confirm the time with the church and ask whether another service follows on the same day.
• Crowns, candles, sugared almonds: usually arranged by the koumbaros and the family, but ask what the church provides.
• Chanters and music: the service has its own hymns. Ask the parish whether anything more is permitted.
• Photographers: share the church's guidelines with them in advance, including where they may stand.
• Flowers: agree when decorations can be brought in and when they must be removed.

After the wedding

The marriage is entered in the parish registers, and it must also be registered with the civil authorities. How and when this is done is set by the state and may change, so check the current guidance on gov.gr, or with the authorities where you live, and ask the priest which certificate he will give you. Keep all the wedding documents together in one folder. You will need them again, for instance when the time comes for a baptism.

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